20 Oct A Family the World Calls Broken
Sometimes I despise Christian radio.
Don’t get me wrong – my car radio is usually tuned to Christian stations, but I have moments when their talk shows come on and they sound so self-righteous I want to scream and change the dial.
Recently, there happened to be an “expert” on families and marriage talking about “broken” families. You know, families like mine. Families who have experienced divorce and deal with remarriage and, in his eyes, need to be called “broken.” (Side note – if you did not grow up in a “broken” family and have not experienced divorce yourself, are you really an expert? What do you authentically know about divorce? Can you really understand the experiences of step-parents and step-children? Your reading a book about it and looking at families like mine as a case study in your PhD program do not, in my eyes, make you an expert whose advice is more valuable than my experience. And your condescending tone and pitying banter leave MUCH to be desired. But I digress.)
Good grief, what a term. “Broken” families.
Listen. I understand. I understand that God’s design is for one mother and one father to live together forever in holy matrimony and to raise their children as a unit. Happily ever after. That’s the goal. It was my desire, too. My wish. My plan. But it wasn’t what happened, in spite of my wishes and plans, and for you to call me – my life – my family “broken”, meaning “having been fractured and damaged and no longer in one piece OR IN WORKING ORDER…” Well, I despise that term.
My family is in working order in spite of the fracture, and THAT, dear expert, is what I want you to know. THAT is what you should be describing on the radio. THAT is what you who are far removed from a “broken” family need to understand. God works in spite of – and sometimes because of – our brokenness. Have we forgotten who our God really is?
I know my family isn’t the way the “experts” say it should be. I know it isn’t what the Bible describes as best-case-scenario. But guess what? NEITHER IS ANYTHING ELSE IN THIS WORLD. It’s called sin, and it destroyed the perfect plan for everything. It destroyed the ideal, and it took away the best-case-scenario. It left everything broken. BUT JESUS IS REDEEMING IT.
Every day, I face consequences of sin breaking my family. Every day, I face situations with my family that we should not have to face. But in the midst of the brokenness and sin, there is my Jesus. And He is making everything beautiful in its time. And that includes right now.
You go ahead and keep calling us broken. I’ll keep calling us redeemed.